Put KINDNESS at the heart of your Social Media Etiquette

A post by Sharyn with a Why - Facilitator of the Red Tent for Soulpreneurs.

My first post in the period of Gemini communication is to invite you, NOT to like me. Does that seem odd?

My writing is primarily marketing. Maybe one day I will write fiction, but for now my writing is there to share who I am in this second, so you will either feel drawn to me, or repelled by me.

It is not designed to convert you to my opinion. Nor is it designed to persuade you or to manipulate you to buy from me. In fact, as I venture further and further into my niche (business for Soulpreneurs), which is becoming more and more aligned with who I am (a multifaceted multidimensional being), it will inevitably mean I am not for everyone! Lets face it, even if on paper, you and I should sizzle, there is nothing to say we will!

The impetus to write this came from some social media post and emails I read last week on the lead up to the new moon that in my opinion were uncalled for. In and of themselves, they were not cruel or vicious, but in the context of a written opinion they were confrontational or self-serving, they were divisive rather than empowering. Whilst I acknowledge we are made of light and shadow, and I don’t condone false positives, these comments certainly gave me pause.

Words have a power and energy that surpasses the mere formation of letters. Indeed, as I read recently, ironically on a social media post, there is a reason why we call it ‘spelling’ Our words do indeed cast a spell, and impact not only the receiver, but you as the giver, and also the myriad of people, voyeurs, who will also read the words in this strange on-line world where privacy is non-existent.

So I wonder, does the writing of something, a mere opinion, in this open, free for all, virtual world, give you, as the reader, the right to comment without prejudice? Does the fact that it is published in an open forum invite opinions? Is that the point?

As I read the comments on the posts, and felt my discomfort, I wondered what to do? What to say? Indeed, should I say anything when they were not on my posts? Whilst I still ponder on the etiquette of socially distanced conversation, the posts in question have passed into the ether, but does the response or feeling created for the author pass as quickly?

Is this potential for swift judgement part of the reason why I have felt unwilling to fully engage on social media? I rarely post an opinion, and I rarely share the comings and goings of my life. Whilst I do not think that will largely change, I suspect over the coming 4 weeks moon cycle, I will be challenged to speak more often, and perhaps more freely as I continue to hone my message and step further into my voice.

However, I will not become a “keyboard warrior”. KINDNESS will be at the heart of my comments. My social media and email etiquette will begin with the premise that if I wouldn’t say it to you out loud whilst looking you in the eye, then I shouldn’t say it in print. If I disagree with a post, I will probably scroll on past - it is not my job to change your mind. If I disagree with your response to my post, I will probably delete it – it not my job to change your mind. I would desire the same from you in return.

The point of communication in my opinion is to create relationship, there are very few real relationships that I have created publicly, in fact our innermost thoughts and feelings are most often shared in private.  

My business communication is shared with friends and strangers alike. It is an opinion which is true of me at a point in time, I am not arrogant enough to call it (or indeed anything) an absolute truth, it is simply my truth in that moment. I’m an explorer, a gatherer of knowledge and wisdom, and as such, I’m not even sure enough to say my opinion will not change before the end of this article! Indeed, a new conversation, something read, or watched, or felt, can create change me in an instant (and has done, this was hastily edited before posting!).

So, if you can contribute to that exploration with kindness and genuine curiosity to grow together, as opposed to inflicting your opinion on me with a view to changing mine, I invite you to engage, but if you can’t respect our space, then I now return to my opening paragraph,

I invite you NOT to like me. Remove me as a ‘friend’, do not follow my comments and unsubscribe from my email list. Feel free to engage with me privately and explain why if you wish, who knows what we might discover about each other. We might even decide to re-friend!

We are all ‘becoming’ every single day and sometimes that becoming is messy. First Be Kind. You have no idea the path someone else is walking. Sx